Monday, March 13, 2006

One of the GREATEST movie moments we've never seen!!

So, as the title of my blog states, I'm squirrelly. Translation - alot of kooky thoughts bouncing around in there. Several people have told me they would like to spend a day in my head, but as Jack Nicholson said in 'As Good As It Gets': Go sell crazy somewhere else, we're all stocked up here!!

So, what exactly does go on inside my noodle on a daily basis? Well, here's one of the things I've been thinking about. Ever wonder what the characters who aren't the main characters are thinking when something BIG happens in a movie?? Their reactions could potentially be the best part of the movie. I have a particular scene in mind. . . .

Luke Skywalker has just surrendered himself over to Imperial troops on the planet of Endor. They escort him to Lord Vader and turn him over. To the avid Star Wars fan, you know what happens next, Luke and Vadar start to chit chat, you know, your typical father-son reunion, Hi I'm the evil Sith Lord who does the Emperor's bidding and your my young rebellious son trying to overthrow the Empire, yadda yadda. But imagine you're the stormtrooper trailing along behind them. You've just brought Vader the ulitimate prisoner!! The elusive Skywalker! And you didn't even have to muck up your nifty stormtrooper pants to do it. So, you're walking behind them all proud of yourself and then you hear Luke say it:
'I know. . . . . .father!!!'
And Darth Vader CONFIRMS IT!!
'So you've accepted the truth that I am your father.'

Your mouth drops! Of course no one can tell because you're in that dorky stormtrooper hood. Dumbfounded, you watch as they two of them saunter off, continuing their little father-son chat. You hustle your plastic covered a$$ to the coffee break room and bust in yelling, 'Oh My GAWD!!' All the other storm troopers look up (with their blank expressionless helmets - honestly, they need bibs it's such a mess to drink a mocha through the air slots). You can hardly speak, 'I just heard Luke Sywalker call Lord Vader DAD!! And Lord Vader AGREED!'
No WAY - they protest, a rumbling rush of gossips starts to spread.
TRUE STORY!! You proclaim. 'Can you freaking believe it??!!' They are all looking at you, looking at each other, the coffee break room is stunned! Even the stormtrooper in the little green Starbucks apron has put down his milk steaming pitcher, slave Ewoks are still pushing minature brooms to clean up the coffee room, because as we all know, Ewoks don't speak English.
'Who's the mother?' someone asks
'Does Darth Vader have a girlfriend?' says the guy in the corner.
Stormrtrooper to the right says, 'How on earth . . I mean, it must have been before the whole evil black suit and cape thing!'
'Darth Vader didn't always wear the suit?'
'Oh yeah, back in the heyday, when I was just a clone trooper, he just wore tights.'
Sage old stormtrooper in the back adds on, 'I remember that now! He was a good looking chap too, you know, before the whole lava pit thing.'
A short silence falls over the crowd as they process this news. 'Holy Death Star,' someone finally says softly. 'Darth Vader is someones dad! Kinda makes me wish I hadn't given my old man such a hard time.'

A second silence falls over the crowd as they mull this over and then grudgingly agree. Life is pretty good as long as Darth Vader is not your dad.

Of course, the gossip wouldn't have long to spread before the Endor shield station gets blown up and then the entire Death Star gets vapourized, but STILL!! What a conversation to overhear!!

So there you have it. One of the greatest movie scenes we've never seen.

2 comments:

Heidi Schempp Fournier said...

ROFL!!

You are most definetly twisted.

But, the part you forgot was the muffled conversation between two storm troopers in the back, "I thought DV was the emperor's life partner?!?! I didn't realize he batted for the other team! No wonder he is so moody!"

Anonymous said...

You're all geeks.